I spent the afternoon with Julie today. The only thing she said that made sense was she called me “Wild Woman” which she has always done since I have always been stubborn and done things on my own. Other than that, she is very out-of-it and makes no sense at all. She sent me out in the hall to check on cheese balls she had in the oven. I don’t know if it is the pain medication or it is just the end but no one will tell me anything. For the first time in two years, she did not have on her wig and she actually had some hair that is her’s. I will go back tomorrow morning and stay with her since she cannot be left alone. She is not allowed to get up since she has no strength to walk and she keeps trying. It breaks my heart to see her this way but all I can do now is pray for her and be there for her. They have given her blood but so far, it has not worked to build her counts up and she still has an infection. But please, keep her in your prayers. At least I want her to get well enough to go home and if she has to die, die at home where she wants to be with her flowers, her things, her dog, and her own bed.
Thank you for an update on Julie. We will still keep her in our prayers and you too. Let her know she has an extended family that is thinking about her.
I am really trying to keep the faith and I keep praying for help to keep the faith but this is really hard. Sometimes we are lucky enough in life to find that one special person who loves us not matter what. Who is always there no matter what. Who will stay up all night on the phone if that is what is needed. Julie and I are that to each other. She tells me her frustrations when she can tell no one else and how hurt she is when she feels that her husband is no help when she needs him the most. We never end a conversation without saying we love each other and we both know we mean it and it is not just words. So thank you so much for lighting the candle, it means more to me than you know right now.
I just spent the last 3 hours with Julie at the hospital. After days of not eating, I got her to take a few bites of food and drink just alittle chocolate milk. She asked me for apple pie which I will make and take to her later today. Her white count is up just alittle but she is fighting a staph infection which she probably got from the hospital on her last visit for blood. She wanted to talk to me alone but we could not get the aide to leave the room and she got very mad. I am sure she wanted me to promise her to get her home and let her die there which I will do one way or another if I have to steal her and take her home. They are not doing anything except giving her blood, antibotics, and pain medication and we can do that at home. They draw blood again this evening and depending on that result, we will know if I can take her home or not. But she was awake enough to ask me to thank you all for the prayers for her. She said she cannot thank everyone enough and she will never forget your kindness to a stranger.
Now I got to make an apple pie for her.
Jane
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