So, a guy lived in Texas where all things are bigger and was proud to live in the biggest state.
Except, of course, Alaska is bigger than Texas. Upon hearing of this, he moved to one of the smaller towns in Alaska.
On a Saturday night at a local watering hole he told his story and about how glad he was to be in Alaska, and asked how he could become an authentic Alaskan Citizen.
Three things, the locals informed him:
- He had to down a pint of Alaskan Moonshine all at once.
- He had to shoot a bear, and
- He had to kiss an Eskimo girl.
So he knocked that moonshine out in about 10 minutes and staggered out the door.
In about four hours he returned. He had obviously been too close to a bear. He had many scratches and a couple of fair flesh wounds and his clothes were torn almost completely off.
After kicking the front door to the bar open, he exclaimed “Alright, now where is the Eskimo girl I am supposed to shoot?”